A Power Fist of Cash – Space Marine: The Board Game in Review

Space Marine: The Board Game is nothing like Space Marine the video game. Contrary to that rich over-the-top digital release, this product is a stripped-down ruleset that is vaguely reminiscent of the Warhammer 40,000 tabletop experience. It’s 40K LaCroix. If you cock your head toward the North and take a deep breath, you get a faint whiff of distant smoke and you just may be able to hear a tiny pop of Bolter fire. Or you might just be having a stroke. It’s hard to tell.

I get it. Having an introduction to the hobby for youth is logical. But I thought that’s what we were doing with Space Marine Adventures, Fireteam, and Lost Patrol. I think there was concern that those games only manufactured fans of the games themselves. Perhaps they were less a gateway and more a little playground.

So, Space Marine: The Board Game.

The design philosophy here is take Warhammer 40,000 and cut away at it until it works for one Marine and a handful of Termagaunts. In whittling away at the ferocious frame of Captain Titus, some craftsman has actually hacked off the head, and arms, and even the legs. We’re left with a torso, rolling around and incapable.

40k with this few of figures doesn’t work. Without fail, Titus fells a few gaunts. Titus gets surrounded. Then the world’s most dull fight for survival ensues. Finally, you pack it up and wish you had spent a half hour playing something better.

There’s no room for creativity or even tactical thinking. The game doesn’t reward daring strategy or any strategy at all. It’s not even dramatic because it feels so scripted and incorrigible. It’s almost a caricature of its parent, the type of ruleset someone would come up with as a joke to poke fun at 40k’s perceived randomness and straightforward playstyle. The seminal miniatures game is so much more than this and it deserves better.

The components are at least lovely. The mounted board is attractive, although it’s useless beyond this limp game as it’s not sized for Kill Team or any other system. The minis are fantastic as always. Yes, the ‘gaunts are re-purposed from a previous release, but the Titus miniature is a new sculpt altogether. The value here is excellent for a Games Workshop product. And I don’t even mind that you have to cut out the tokens with scissors.

There is a principle disconnect here. Imagine a young person wanting to get into this hobby. The company’s bread and butter. They see this box on the shelf at their local Target and give it a go. In such a case, the person is not familiar with Warhammer’s rules. The intent of this product should be to hook them. Like a wily fish, reel that sucker on in.

They go through the effort to assemble these badass figures, cut out the tokens, give the rules pamphlet a read, and start rolling them bones. The game-unlike the Titus miniature-is a whole lotta nothing. Why would they then get fired up to spend a drop pod of cash on a Combat Patrol box? It presents the hobby in its most unflattering light; toys first, rules second.

This is the opposite of Blitz Bowl and Fireteam. In those boxes, you get the excellent Games Workshop figures, but you also get complete experiences that ignite imagination and spark wonder. Those sets include all of the rules for expanding the games, you only need to buy more sets of minis. I’m shocked how they went from those to this. I’m not even sure they know what they did, as this feels an errant decision made without much thought.

I’m really worried that Space Marine: The Board Game will be a success. I’m a fan of many of their previous titles and it’s not that I want Games Workshop to suffer. But I fear this box will be scooped up by experienced players and collectors who want that Captain Titus miniature. That alone will ensure a large number of units are sold and I would suspect Target will find the arrangement favorable. This is disappointing, however, as it’s a total misunderstanding of this release’s purpose.

I’ve found this primarily a frustration. It’s a waste of material, a waste of game design, and a waste of time. This is one of the shortest reviews I’ve ever written, but I don’t think it needs any more words. Games should be developed with artistry and utility. Space Marine: The Board Game has all the soul of a pop-up ad.

 

A review copy of the game was provided by the publisher.

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